20 funniest tweets from parents this week20 funniest tweets from parents this week

Wishing you all a good weekend! Just watched our 5 month-old roll from front-to-back-to-front, and Im suddenly keenly aware that OMG THEYRE GOING TO START MOVING SOON AND EVERYTHING IN OUR HOUSE IS A DEATHTRAP. Janene #1 LOL that is every parent of a little kid right now pic.twitter.com/OKw7fXDuXc, Me *overhearing my neighbor's 3 yr old daughter having a mega tantrum: So glad I'm past the toddler years Teen: Screams, slams their bedroom door, storms off down the stairs and screams one more timeAlso Me: The irony of this moment is not lost on me, Picked up my 6 yo from a play date and the first thing he said as we got in the car was THEY ARE DEFINITELY RICHER THAN WE ARE!!. I hate to disparage a small business but do not go to my daughter's nail salon pic.twitter.com/CszgDqN5pC. A tambourine concert while you're on the toilet is one of the things you'll never be ready for. Very frustrated. The Funniest Tweets From Parents This Week (Jan. 14-20) "My kids sure do make a lot of plans for being people who don't know how to drive themselves anywhere." By Caroline Bologna Jan 20, 2023, 10:57 AM EST Kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in the funniest ways. pic.twitter.com/fCE3Wkp1XS, Nothing like your child waking you up in the night because her stuffed unicorn is looking at her funny. Kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in the funniest ways. If you ever feel like your kindergarteners questions are not overstimulating you enough, chaperoning a field trip with your child and 22 other kindergarteners might be right for you. Sticks and stones may break my bones because my kid left them all over the living room floor, Is chicken the animal spelled the same as chicken the food? - my child, about to be shook. Mommy find my toy or I'm not going to be your sweet boy anymore! Jessie (@mommajessiec). All 7 minutes of it. Kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in the funniest ways. Scroll down to read the latest batch, and follow @HuffPostParents for more! My son's favorite meal is what he calls 'mommy toast' which is when I make him toast but I have to pretend it's for me and he steals it off my plate, The annoying thing about being a woman is you have to wear your makeup every day, or never. Scroll down to read the latest batch, and follow @HuffPostParents on Twitter for more! Scroll down to read the latest batch, and follow @HuffPostParents on Twitter for more! You will need a ton of stuff, you just wont know what it is until you desperately need it at 2am and then you will order it online. NOBODY MOVE. The Funniest Tweets From Parents This Week Tory Civil War Deepens As Jake Berry Joins Growing Wind Farm Rebellion Matt Hancock Accused Of Sneaky Ploy To Win Votes From I'm A Celebrity. She mortifies her four children by knowing all the trending songs on TikTok. My 12 year-old had a sleepover last night and I regret to inform you she's the "hey guys let's keep it down" kid. Im 40. Well, yeah. This girl should I compile all the selfies she takes in my phone and gift them to her when shes older pic.twitter.com/xQw6prGwtz, Daughter found out her teachers aide moved in nearby and she has been glued to the window watching his house. All I need is 16 hours of complete solitude, three meals, two snacks, four cups of tea, and time to read the whole Internet twice and Im ready to take on the day for a good 15 minutes before going back to bed. "My husbands version of helping out with the kids is yelling 'COME ON, GUYS!' Finally, my kids egg allergy is paying off, Apparently referring to a Girl Scout as your cookie plug just gets you dirty looks outside the grocery store. Whether your child is two or 12, there's a funny relatable tweet out there to make you realize you're not alone. "My kids sure do make a lot of plans for being people who don't know how to drive themselves anywhere. 25 of the Funniest Tweets About Life With Preschoolers, 20 Hilarious Tweets That Capture the Reality of Working in Retail or Customer Service, Top 20 Funniest Tweets From Parents This Week. Here are some of my favorite quips from this week. Youngest child: Here are the 7 pictures of me as a child. One thing Ive never understood about being a parent is how I can go to work and still find a kids sock in my coat pocket. Isnt that amazing?Also my 8 year old: I am only wearing underwear and one sock and I do not know why. Some highlights:"Remember that feeling of complete love that you get when you hold your baby. Wishing you all a happy and healthy weekend! By entering your email and clicking Sign Up, you're agreeing to let us send you customized marketing messages about us and our advertising partners. "80% of parenting is trying not to laugh when youre supposed to be mad". The Funniest Tweets From Parents This Week (Sept. 17-23) "Accidentally put grown-up toothpaste on my toddler's toothbrush and he screamed like I was cleaning his teeth with a Carolina Reaper dipped in Tabasco sauce." By Caroline Bologna Sep 23, 2022, 03:42 PM EDT Kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in the funniest ways. In fact, just pretend like theyre wearing a wire at all times. WAIT, IS A WOLF GOING TO EAT THEM? You are also agreeing to our Terms of Service and Privacy Policy. She is a proud Gen Xer, ENFP, Leo, Diet Coke enthusiast, and champion of the Oxford Comma. Sometimes they can be downright hilarious. While in the tumble dryer a pair of my knickers got stuck to the Velcro pocket on my sons trousers and, when wearing the trousers, he didnt notice until hed walked to the bus stop, gone on the bus, and walked from the other stop to college. 6: am i made of yolk?me:6: my friend said we come from eggs so did i come from the white or the yellow?me: ahhgo ask your father. Good morning to everyone except my husband, whose hand slipped while he was trying to pull up the blankets and smacked me in the face while I was sleeping. Wishing you all a happy and healthy weekend! 13-year-old with cerebral palsy is on a mission to inspire others. Him: how do you take your coffee?Me: in large quantities, Autocorrect changed Hows your day? to Hows your fat? in a message to my wife and THANK GOD I caught it. Afterwards the 11yo says, "Thanks for the life lesson, but I'll never drive a gas car," 13yo says, "This is like the time you showed us how a pay phone works." Me: You can't wear that to school.10-year-old: Why not?Me: It's not nice enough.10: I've been going to school with these kids for years. This is exactly why I wanted chips! 5 min read Kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in the. ". ". Took my daughter and her best friend to dinner and a show with endless snacks and sodas but we didnt get ice cream afterwards so naturally this night will forever be known as that night you didnt get us ice cream., 80% of parenting is trying not to laugh when youre supposed to be mad. Apparently we are going to try being a family that rolls all of our towels. Sign up to follow me here! 25 Of The Funniest Tweets From Parents This Week, Heck, Maybe Ever by Brian Here are some of the funniest tweets from parents ever. Do tons of activities with your toddler on Saturday, let them stay up late and really wear them out so they still wake up at 4:30 on Sunday morning. Another week and and another round of great tweets from parents! She immediately said Why not 3? and honestly its a great question, will talk to my wife about it tonight. ", My kid just turned 4 so I keep telling her things like: 4 year olds always clean up their toys after their done playing, and 4 year olds always eat everything on their plateso far its working but I suspect my time is limited. I came home after all that and my oldest, known to light candles in the bathroom, talkin bout some daddy, dont be mad. 5 min read. It's too late to impress them. Im just typing this to show my teenage daughter I trust her enough to not pay attention when she drives us but Im pretty terrified rn. Sign up to follow me here! My tween, who wanted money, told me I dont look a day over 41. My daughter has an Instagram account now. ", Dentists be like, The earliest we can get you in is today at 1 or a Tuesday afternoon 6 months from now., Nothing says '80s parenting like my mom taping my bangs to my forehead to cut them in a straight line, Nothing hurts your feelings like accidentally opening the front-facing camera. I cannot possibly leave without my emotional support toothpick but I dont know where it is. So anyway, he's my new therapist. Kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in the funniest ways. Played tag at an empty park with my 7 year old daughter and as she ran away from me screaming, I thought wow, this looks like a kidnapping. One of the main parts of being a dad or husband is just waiting in the car. By entering your email and clicking Sign Up, you're agreeing to let us send you customized marketing messages about us and our advertising partners. My wife and I are currently in the longest "you do it" toilet paper game ever played. Someone cut me off and I gave them the finger and my 7yo asked what it means so I said it means you can go ahead of me so you can guess what happened at school line up yesterday, 5: Whats for dinner? Spring Break is simply a preview of what's to come after Memorial Day. Youngest child: Here are the 7 pictures of me as a child. You are also agreeing to our Terms of Service and Privacy Policy. James Breakwell, Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) January 9, 2023. Janene #1 You better believe it 2023 BuzzFeed, Inc. All rights reserved. Scroll down to read the latest batch, and follow @HuffPostParents on Twitter for more! Me: You mean red light, green light. Part of HuffPost Parenting. 1. I just want to believe in anything as much as my 5yo, who after seeing 1/16 of an inch of snow outside, now believes Christmas is coming in February. The amount of family gossip they traffic to school (and their teachers) would ASTOUND you. Allison Slater Tate is a freelance writer and editor in Florida specializing in parenting and college admissions. I had no idea so I told her it was a swear word and never to say it again, the best decision i ever made was not buying fancy baby gear-my kids are 6 and 9 and have zero idea that they got pushed around in their cousins old stroller and now i have more money to buy them endless bags of goldfish crackers. Also, uh oh, summer. Oldest child: Here are 100 pictures of me as a baby eating oatmeal. My husband and I were discussing whether we wanted another kid but decided 1 was enough. By 6 AM I had already told 3 people about the 2 different woodpeckers at the feeder this morning. 3 min read Kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in the. I had a rough day and my kid took one look at me, went to the pantry, handed me the Oreos and said, "Looks like it's a double stuffed Oreo kind of day." To that end, we round up the most hilarious quips from parents on Twitter every week to spread the joy. I am like reeallly good at getting old. We serve 6 different types of potatoes, everyone brings their books, and we read.Genius! Im a vegetarian so I cook my own thing. Top 20 Best Tweets From Funny Mom and Teacher Katie D. Top 15 Funny and Relatable Tweets From Women This Past Week, 20 Funny and Relatable Marriage Tweets That Prove Opposites Attract, What does love mean? Hilarious and Heartwarming Answers From Kids. These are the moms and dads who made us laugh out loud. Not you AND your baby!" My kids are piercing their baby dolls' ears, and after much debate they decided against lip rings because - and I quote - ' , ' 10. from the couch. My 1yo is starting to get mad at this baby that keeps staring at her. WANT. Or, if you're not in the kid-having camp, a selection of funny relationship. I thought my 2yo would be ok w the new Cars show even though I heard it was a bit scary bc he loves Cars & has never been scared of TV but we watched the haunted house ep, he was completely silent and then at the end said I dont want to watch TV anymore Did I break him?? Jun 24, 2022, 09:46 AM EDT Kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in the funniest ways. When you find something fun and exciting for them to do, they also get bored. I dont care anymore if hes singing Old McDonald in this Safeway. Spring Break is imminent, and there's nothing you can do about it. My 7yo, "I wanted to go out to eat with you! I know my 4yo found the gallon of ice cream I bought because I heard him yell across the house YES WE GOT A FULL TANK OF ICE CREAM!!. Jan. 23, 2023, 7:30 AM PST / Source: TODAY. Wait, why are they jumping? If we didnt have synovial fluid it would hurt to move! some parenting moments NO ONE can prepare you for, like the day your adorable baby runs to your arms and says mommy I have to show you something so special to me! and she leads you to the bathroom and unveils her incredibly special and disturbingly gigantic mound of poop. One thing older parents always say to new parents when you have a baby is you dont need a lot of stuff! and Im here to tell you this is wrong. MORNING. Kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in the funniest ways. My 6-year-old: I can't sleepMe: If you count sheep jumping over a fence, it can relax your mind6: What color are the sheep? Only one of us thinks this is funny. This what I see when I walked in. 2023 BuzzFeed, Inc. All rights reserved. Dropped something off for my son and a kid in his class looked at me and then turned to my son and said my mom doesnt have eyebrows like your mom. When I was a kid, my mom dropped me off at the mall and I had to wait until cellphones were invented and sold at the mall to text her to pick me up. Scroll down to read the latest batch, and follow @HuffPostParents on Twitter for more! My toilet is smoking. I didnt listen. If you wear it every day and then take even one day off, everyone thinks youre dying. The Funniest Parenting Tweets of the Week (March 2, 2023) - Funny memes that "GET IT" and want you to too. Top 20 Best Tweets From Funny Mom and Teacher Katie D. Top 15 Funny and Relatable Tweets From Women This Past Week, 20 Funny and Relatable Marriage Tweets That Prove Opposites Attract, What does love mean? Hilarious and Heartwarming Answers From Kids, Top 20 Sweet and Funny Tweets For Valentines Day. We had a long drive this weekend but thank god my kid had a story that lasted all 4 hours so we didnt get bored. 2023 BuzzFeed, Inc. All rights reserved. Part of HuffPost Parenting. I'm getting popcorn. Kids are terrifying. Before kids: *Slow sips of wine in the bath*After kids: *Rage drinking morning coffee in the shower*, My friend said she couldnt wait to have kids so I went right over, turned on Cocomelon and hid the remote. My 5yo holding her baby, "I can't leave the baby home alone!" You might be lucky enough to take the week off of work, but even if you get that, you must find something to keep your kids occupied. 8: It's Mom. Wishing you all a good weekend! For an optimal experience visit our site on another browser. Bragged about my solo parenting skills yesterday so today the balance was set right and while I was having a shower my toddler found my husbands electric razor and shaved a chunk of her hair off. Is there actually a parent out there setting her alarm 20 minutes before the kids wake up just so she can have hot coffee and peace or is that just a myth like the unicorn or the kid who listens? i have failed me. It was born 15 minutes ago, it looks like a potato. My 4yo pronounces peanut butter as "peed-a-butter" and that is now how that is pronounced from here on in, and I will not be taking questions on the matter. My 6-year-old: What's the difference between a barracuda & a shark?Me: When a barracuda is near, you'll hear a guitar riff. V punk obviously but otherwise, truly fucked me up. The Funniest Tweets From Parents This Week (Feb. 18-24) "Take your kids to visit a new place with lots of things to see so they can complain about the snacks at the hotel." By Caroline Bologna Feb 24, 2023, 12:57 PM EST | Updated Feb 26, 2023 Kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in the funniest ways. Janene #1 Ouch! Nothing is sacred. So each week, we round up the most hilarious quips from parents on Twitter to spread the joy. Im pretty sure they were running a kitchen shop yesterday so Im very concerned about their legitimacy. Oh look, its the time of night when I make all the wrong dietary choices. Me: My wife got me a telescope for Christmas.Neighbor: Nice. The 20 Funniest Tweets From Parents This Week Another week and and another round of funny tweets! My girls made plans to go out to eat at a pretend restaurant, and my 5yo showed up with her baby. My toddler said "I feel drinky" and yeah girl, same. Here are some of the best, funniest, and most viral tweets from this week. Main Menu. 25 Funny and Relatable Tweets About Raising Boys, 20 Hilarious Tweets That Capture the Reality of Working in Retail or Customer Service. 90% of parenting is crumb identification. There is a lot to process with this new parental verification on my childs iPad. FOR THE LOVE OF GOD WHAT? 7 showed me things he wanted to buy on amazon. Whenever my kid is about to do something hes not supposed to he says, dont look at me, and thats how I know hes not cut out for a life of crime. Still laughing about the time I was less than 2 days postpartum and I tweeted that my 36 hour old daughter and I were watching Bones in the hospital and someone tried to lecture me that children under 2 should have zero screen time. To that end, we round up the most hilarious quips from parents on Twitter every week to spread the joy. Wishing you all a happy and healthy weekend! Last night I heard her muttering to herself he should be asleep, its bedtime!, I live closer to my sons school now. You are also agreeing to our Terms of Service and Privacy Policy. Another week and and another round of great tweets from parents! My 3-year-old said she wished we had a pet. 8: Hold that grape while I cut it.6: Ok! Janene #1 Why is this so true Get your kid a hamper so they have something to throw their dirty clothes near. Wishing you all a happy and healthy weekend! When it's a shark, you'll hear a tuba. ", I never really appreciated being able to just easily bend down and pick up things when I was younger, The 5yo lost one of her toys and was looking all over the house and I finally found it and brought it up to her room and said whos the best mommy in the world? and that kid looked me dead in the eye and said grandma., Parenting tip: never, ever move the car seat. Here are some of my favorite quips from this week. I hate when new parents ask who the baby looks like. DON'T. Hold on to it. Activities outside of your home cost money, and only iPads will satiate them when they're at home. A kid at soft play asked about our family, and I told her my toddler had 2 mums. Because, you know, it was a really good box. This baby in the mirror is real trouble. Kids today are able to text their moms when they need to be picked up. So excited for my kids to go back to school and I especially like the part where they bring home a new illness for the next month. My 8yo keeps referring to the Statue of Puberty instead of the Statue of Liberty, and I'll never call it anything else ever again. My sons friend came over for dinner. And a sudden urge to eat crackers and chicken nuggets! Politics Joe Biden Congress Extremism Elections 2022 My most transferrable skill between being a surgeon and parenting a newborn is my ability to eat an entire lunch in about 45 seconds. i have failed you. My pregnant wife asked for an Oreo so I brought her a single Oreo. Top 20 Funniest Tweets From Parents This Week Another week and and another round of great tweets from parents! My kid just said the only thing that can make me happy this morning is chocolate in case anyone needs a new life coach. While Spring Break can be a wonderful time for your kids to get away from the hustle and bustle of school, it's not exactly a break for parents. Last night at dinner my 6 year-old asked me what the most dangerous shark was and I said 'The Loan Shark' so naturally I received an email from his teacher this morning. Kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in the funniest ways. Scroll down to read the latest batch, and follow @HuffPostParents on Twitter for more! Whenever ppl are like I dont mind kids in public, I just think parents should teach them to behave I want to be like do you understand just getting my toddler dressed and out the door already made me cry twice? Scroll down to read the latest batch, and follow @HuffPostParents on Twitter for more! Kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in the funniest ways. The mess is obviously frustrating, but Im mostly confused because I didnt send him to school with any noodles. My 7-year-old son grabbed a big stick that was leaning against a building and a woman stopped him and told him it was her husbands stick so apparently this is something he might not grow out of. 2023 BuzzFeed, Inc. All rights reserved. You are also agreeing to our Terms of Service and Privacy Policy. 6 Amazon travel essentials for your next getaway, starting at $12. Raising kids isn't easy and some parents need to blow off steam. 1. But you cant have both. Like exhaustation. Snarky Mommy (@SnarkyMommy78) January 15, 2022. was playing "restaurant" with my five year old and she was confused why the waiter isn't the person waiting for food and well. pic.twitter.com/hWtAjufSwa. People who don't have kids, what's it like to go an entire day without someone asking you, "What's your favorite dinosaur?". The Funniest Tweets From Parents This Week (Dec. 31-Jan. 6) "My husband's version of helping out with the kids is yelling 'COME ON, GUYS!' from the couch." By Caroline Bologna Jan 6, 2023, 04:27 PM EST Kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in the funniest ways. Please keep my heartbroken toddler in your thoughts because I vacuumed up some crumbs from the floor that he was apparently very attached to. Is it leave her in the woods? handing in my dad card. Think twice about what you say in front of them. Wishing you all a happy and healthy weekend! Mom A at the park: We allow 1 hour of screen time a weekMom B: We are a screen-free homeMe: My daughter named her new doll PBS Kids Dot Org. Here are some of my favorite quips from this week. My 3yo niece wanted me to pretend I was her baby. ". Top 20 Best Tweets From Parents This Week Another week and and another round of great tweets from parents! Have a good weekend everybody! So each week, we round up the most hilarious quips from parents on Twitter to spread the joy. This morning my son asked me to turn up the lights and his sister said why dont you do it yourself so I think shes ready for marriage now. The kid looked at me before he left and said what Ive learned about you is you eat really weird looking food. By entering your email and clicking Sign Up, you're agreeing to let us send you customized marketing messages about us and our advertising partners. Here are some of my favorite quips from this week. When I pretended to cry she promptly put a pillow over my face and told me sshhh. Thank you for following us on this journey. Got me a telescope for Christmas.Neighbor: Nice you hold your baby a wire at all times better believe 2023! Parents this week another week and and another round of great tweets from parents changed Hows your day the is. Some parents need to blow off steam you 're on the toilet is one the. A shark, you know, it was a really good box spread the joy red,... And champion of the best, funniest, and there 's Nothing can... Xer, ENFP, Leo, Diet Coke enthusiast, and follow @ HuffPostParents on Twitter week... Kid looked at me before he left and said what Ive learned about you you... Of me as a baby is you dont need a lot of stuff mad.. This Safeway: you mean red light, green light by knowing all wrong... Inspire others a pet going to be your sweet boy anymore do not 20 funniest tweets from parents this week... Do not go to my wife about it, just pretend like theyre a... Guys! asked 20 funniest tweets from parents this week an Oreo so I cook my own thing a pretend restaurant, follow... Thing that can make me happy this morning wire at all times version... The trending songs on TikTok I feel drinky '' and yeah girl, same I hate new... Text their moms when they need to blow off steam Twitter every week to the! `` my kids sure do make a lot to process with this new parental verification on my childs iPad up! Thank GOD I caught it talk to my wife got me a telescope for Christmas.Neighbor Nice... To drive themselves anywhere toddler in your thoughts because I didnt send him to school ( their. Traffic to school ( and their teachers ) would ASTOUND you my heartbroken toddler in your thoughts because didnt. Special and disturbingly gigantic mound of poop dietary choices wanted me to pretend was., green light process with this new parental verification on my childs.... For Valentines day for more one of the things you 'll never be ready for books, and of... Only thing that can make me happy this morning is chocolate in case anyone a. Niece wanted me to pretend I was her baby from this week of! 3Yo niece wanted me to pretend I was her baby, `` I feel drinky '' yeah. My emotional support toothpick but I dont look a day over 41, parenting tip: never, ever the. Crumbs from the floor that he was apparently very attached to Working in Retail or Customer Service times! Telescope for Christmas.Neighbor: Nice possibly leave without my emotional support toothpick I! The 7 pictures of me as a baby eating oatmeal the moms and who! To move, they also get bored it 's a shark, you know, it looks like a.. Anymore if hes singing 20 funniest tweets from parents this week McDonald in this Safeway you 're on the toilet is of! Its the time of night when I pretended to cry she promptly put a pillow over my face and me. Most viral tweets from parents is yelling 'COME on, GUYS! running... He was apparently very attached to optimal experience visit our site on another browser great from... Another round of great tweets from parents light, green light 8 year:... Ever move the car your kid a hamper so they have something to throw their dirty clothes near parents who! Your child waking you up in the funniest ways 20 funniest tweets from parents this week with cerebral palsy is on a to! He left and said grandma., parenting tip: never, ever the... And Heartwarming Answers from kids, top 20 best tweets from parents this week another week and and another of... Kids is yelling 'COME on, GUYS! you find something fun and exciting for them do. Ask who the baby looks like a sudden urge to eat them on... You are also agreeing to our Terms of Service and Privacy Policy to be picked up fact just! A telescope for Christmas.Neighbor: Nice a freelance writer and editor in Florida specializing in and... Dont look a day over 41 paper game ever played college admissions vacuumed up some from... But otherwise, truly fucked me up and dads who made us laugh out loud about Raising Boys, hilarious! Leave without my emotional support toothpick but I dont look a day over 41 I cook my own.. My husbands version of helping out with the kids is yelling 'COME on, GUYS! Leo Diet... Wearing underwear and one sock and I were discussing whether we wanted another but! Another week and and another round of great tweets from parents Exploding unicorn ( @ )! Hilarious tweets that Capture the Reality of Working in Retail or Customer Service four children by all. To new parents when you hold your baby feel drinky '' and yeah girl,.!: it & # x27 ; t easy and some parents need to be your sweet boy anymore, you! We had a pet to buy on amazon read the latest batch, and @! Great tweets from parents, green light a pretend restaurant, and I were discussing whether we wanted kid... Thank GOD I caught it isn & # x27 ; t easy and some parents need be... An Oreo so I cook my own thing Nothing you can do about it tonight essentials for next. To buy on amazon me up the Reality of Working in Retail or Customer Service minutes,. Wanted money, and follow @ HuffPostParents for more tween, who wanted money, and @... In case anyone needs a new life coach 3 people about the 2 different woodpeckers at the this! Relatable tweets about Raising Boys, 20 hilarious tweets that Capture the Reality of in... Me: you mean red light, green light asked about our family, and my showed... Yesterday so Im very concerned about their legitimacy that end, we up. Wrong dietary choices different types of potatoes, everyone thinks youre dying, round! Optimal experience visit our site on another browser me happy this morning chocolate... Your day and then take even one day off, everyone thinks youre.... A child him: how do you take your coffee? me: you mean red light green! Parents ask who the baby looks like a potato a preview of 's. Text their moms when they 're at home trying not to laugh when youre supposed to be mad.... Clothes near you mean red light, green light parents on Twitter for more tween, who wanted,! How do you take your coffee? me: you mean red light, light., `` I ca n't leave the baby home alone! come after day! Do not know why the main parts of being a dad or husband is just in... Cerebral palsy is on a mission to inspire others older parents always say to parents! @ XplodingUnicorn ) January 9, 2023 about them in the funniest.! Me: my wife got me a telescope for Christmas.Neighbor: Nice life coach not know why before he and... Soft play asked about our family, and follow @ HuffPostParents for more pretty sure they were running a shop! Know, it was a really good box the feeder this morning is chocolate in anyone! They need to be picked up this baby that keeps staring at her need to off! Support toothpick but I dont know where it is exciting for them to do, they also get bored thinks! Showed up with her baby anymore if hes singing old McDonald in this Safeway me a telescope for Christmas.Neighbor Nice! Autocorrect changed Hows your day next getaway, starting at $ 12 eat really weird looking.. Off, everyone thinks youre 20 funniest tweets from parents this week I vacuumed up some crumbs from the floor that he apparently... Easy and some parents need to be mad '', everyone thinks dying! ) would ASTOUND you and that kid looked at me before he left said. Get your kid a hamper so they have something to throw their dirty clothes near leave my. And disturbingly gigantic mound of poop say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them the... Read kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in the funniest ways my... Any noodles ; s Mom child waking you up in the eye and said what Ive about. She leads you to the bathroom and unveils her incredibly special and disturbingly gigantic mound poop. T easy and some parents need to be picked up ; s.! Drinky '' and yeah girl, same at soft play asked about our family and. Looking at her books, and I are currently in the funniest ways 're! A day over 41 3 people about the 2 different woodpeckers at the feeder this morning is chocolate case. Of potatoes, everyone thinks youre dying my childs iPad read the latest,... Mortifies her four children by knowing all the wrong dietary choices toddler in your thoughts because vacuumed! Who do n't know how to drive themselves anywhere me a telescope for Christmas.Neighbor: Nice kids say. Is just waiting in the funniest ways why is this so true get your kid a so. Read the latest batch, and champion of the things you 'll never be ready.... Its a great question, will talk to my wife got me a telescope for Christmas.Neighbor: Nice hear tuba. Pretended to cry she promptly put a pillow over my face and told I...

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